If you were to ask me a month ago what I would be doing for the holidays, I probably would have cringed at the thought of me cuddled up in bed with my laptop, working, and possibly eating Ramen. With the loss of my parents, grandparents, and me not really being in touch with my family, holidays can be hard. I’ve spent a lot of my Thanksgiving holidays Netflix-ing alone and my Christmas holidays on a plane to some European or Middle Eastern country to escape the feeling of lacking a family to spend time with.
But I’m patient enough to know that those things will come and I’ll have a family of my own one day as well. Probably much sooner than later as I am currently in a great mental and emotional space. Long story short, I’m loving everything that’s happening in my life right now.
This year, Thanksgiving was full of surprises as I made my way to San Francisco for a weekend of reviewing restaurants and activities on the travel-planning app TRIP, which also allowed me some much-needed time to reconnect and bond with two friends.
Snapchat charades
My friend Lauren and I met in 2004 after she subscribed to a Xanga blog I used to write diary entries on and we found out we were dating the same guy. Needless to say, we dropped the guy and she’s become one of my best friends.
My other friend (we will just call him D) is someone I’ve known for a few years.
D and I trying out some great Thai
We met in LA, just before he decided to purposefully reroute his life and enrolled in law school. Three years later, I show up at his house for Thanksgiving with my friend in tow like “Hey, what’s up, hello?” **in my best Fetty Wap voice **. It was really cool to reconnect with him since he is a fan fav amongst my friends in terms of guys I should actually date.
If only I wasn’t emotionally unavailable at the moment …you know how that goes. I think everyone should have at least a good 6-12 months to love on themselves after going through a disappointing dating situation or heartbreak before hopping into something else. That way you can start things fresh versus having remnants of what the last guy (or girl) did weighing on your shoulders.
At any rate, Thanksgiving dinner was amazing. My plate was full of chicken, greens, mash potatoes, and pecan yams. If that wasn’t enough, D’s cousin dropped by with a bushel of crabs that they cooked, steamed, and seasoned to perfection.
I was totally against the crabs being alive and watching them get steamed so we could eat them
…but I changed my tune real quick once they were cooked lol
There was also a drink menu that had at least 21 cocktails listed for us to choose from and we settled on Lemon Drops all night. Someone had some serious bartending skills because those were the best damn drinks I have ever had in my life. The food might have clocked in as my best Thanksgiving dinner ever as well. Only thing that was missing was the mac and cheese!
When we returned to Lauren’s hotel, all I could do was count my blessings and think about how grateful I was for everyone that has come into my life, the things I’ve been able to accomplish, and most of all — being in a great mental space. Self-care has been huge to me in 2016 and taking the time to really love on myself and focus on the things I love, like travel, writing, photography, and producing, has brought me great joy over the past few months. Not to mention being able to stand in the mirror and say, “I love me” after spending years beating myself up. It’s gratifying. I don’t think anyone has been as mentally abusive to me as I have to myself, and I put an end to that this year.
Yes, I am a work in progress, but I also know that I’m enough. I’m amazing just the way I am and I am confidently accepting that now. It’s not until you know in your heart that you are deserving of every blessing that comes your way that you begin to be open to receiving even more versus subconsciously sabotaging yourself and blocking incredible things from happening.
And that “I deserve this!” mindset is so necessary to live your best life in the New Year. Remember that!
It’s officially countdown to 2017.
Are you ready? Because I am.
How did you spend your Thanksgiving?
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What would happen if you devoted this year to loving yourself more?
Keep in touch. Follow me on Instagram and snapchat: lovenecole!
This story made me smile.
I spent my thanksgiving surrounded by friends. Holidays are super tough. My family is so dysfunctional. For my own mental health I had to eliminate myself from the holiday equation! Plan on doing the same for Christmas as well.
I’m going to start traveling for these holidays too.
With family and friends! It was great! ❤️
So glad you’re in a good space. Sometimes it’s a hard fought battle to get there but it’s so gratifying when you do!
I spent Thanksgiving at home with my family.
Omfg if I would have seen you I would have gagged girl idk u we’re in the bay aww… I spent mines in Antioch Ca with family.
Love this Necole
Xanga tho lol that’s where I started blogging after MySpace lol
I had thanksgiving three times … the Saturday before thanksgiving with a few of my siblings. . Thursday with my best friend’s and their family and on Friday with my family. .. I should be tired of thanksgiving food but I just ate some yams lol. .
I’m really loving the space you are in and the positive energy you are giving!!! Stay prayed up everything will fall in place!!!
I spent my thanksgiving with you! best one in a looooong time.