What is it about men loving crazy women and vice versa?
A few weeks ago, I caught up with my DMV buddy Wale at BOA Steakhouse and jokingly repeated back to him a quote I heard him say on the radio:

I like girls that are a little crazy because the physical aspect of the relationship is a lot better. Maybe I gotta re-prioritized the things that I like.
Passionate and insanity are like cousins- a very thin line. If we were in a relationship and we had a misunderstanding and it was no stepping outside that, I want her to be passionate enough to slash my tires if I step out on her.


Wale’s eyes lit up at just the thought of a crazy woman. I could feel his excitement! Like that’s deep. On his record ‘Passive Aggress-Her’, he spits the lyrics “I’m in love with a woman that’s crazy, maybe it’s the way she praise me’, however he’s not alone. Most men and women love just a tad bit of dysfunction in their relationships because they believe it’s validation of how much their significant other feels or cares about them.
How crazy are you about me? Show me? 
Men love to play fixer upper with a woman with issues as well as feel wanted and needed. They also believe crazy women are passionate in bed. Some women, on the other hand, love for their men to show how much they love or care about them in public, even if it means he is storming up in the club with pajama pants or footies on to grab her up out of there in front of everyone.
I remember I had an ex-boyfriend who would show up while I was hanging out with friends and everyone would clear the room. He wouldn’t say a word, just would storm in, give me that look and I would follow right behind him.  (I was 18, I didn’t know any better). He never put his hands on me or raised his voice but I just knew not to step out of line and other guys would not even look my way out of fear. I think in a way I felt protected and as though he wouldn’t let anyone do anything to harm me, especially my mom’s abusive boyfriend that I was dealing with at home at the time. As the relationship progressed I found myself asking, ‘what if this guy eventually turns into ‘your mom’s boyfriend,” and I realized that he had all of the qualities of this other man that I disliked so much. I then began to fear my boyfriend and that eventually made me leave the relationship.
As I grew a bit older and matured, any signs of aggression in the beginning stages of the relationship started to scare me off. Things like talking in a threatening tone, mental abuse, raising his voice, etc were the first indication of the relationship headed in a not so healthy direction. I made a promise to myself that I was not going to be that girl caught up in a dysfunctional or abusive relationship. I wanted better for myself.
So I have to ask, what attracts people to those type of relationships? Abuse? Dysfuntion? and just plain out craziness?
I’ve heard many stories from women over time and I always ask, ‘How did you get to that point’? What made you sit outside of his house or almost run him over with your car? What made him hang you over a balcony? I’ve never ever thought about slashing any tires, called up the ‘other girl’ or anything that people classify as being ‘coo coo’. I have, however, had some bouts of ‘crazy’ mental games that I’m sure cut deeper than a slashed tire..haha.
Thankfully I’ve been so focused on my goals over the past few years that I haven’t been emotionally invested enough in any one person to get to that point. I can’t say that I never will because I’ve learned over time that when you’ve invested a great amount of time and energy into someone and allowed them into your heart… it’s almost inevitable to act out of character when that person does something to hurt you.
I remember Big Sean saying in our interview

I just think it’s human nature to be crazy, especially when you love somebody.

And that in itself is why I am very careful about who I’m willing to give my heart to. It’s alright to be crazy in love, but that ‘crazy love’ is for the birds..